And Now, Irresponsible Headlines

So yesterday I posted about sloppy reporting about an American Airlines flight with engine trouble. Today’s gripe? The irresponsible headline “Could Your Plane Be Shot Out Of The Sky By Lighning Strike?”. Why irresponsible? Think about it.

Thanksgiving and the Winter holiday season are some of the busiest travel times for families. And with fewer planes in the sky, there’s more and more people jammed onto existing flights. So it’s now Christmas Eve, when so many families have flown to be with loved ones, and io9 decides to run that headline.

Hey io9? How about you just run the headline, “Have Fun Now, Because This May Be Your Last Holiday If You Die In A Fiery Ball Of Flame On Your Flight Home!”

What’s worse? After reading this article, your damned annoying loved ones may never leave! Ugh!

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Bad Writing or Bad Research? Or Both?

Okay, so I may be an amateur blogger/hack, but at least I try to get my basic facts right!  That’s what frustrates me with some stories out there.  People just don’t freaking try!  And, I have a sneaking suspicion, that they’re outsourcing a bunch of these stories to people whose first language is not English.

Case in point: An enstarz.com article about American Airways flight #1295.  Go read that, and you count the things that are wrong…  I’ll wait.

Let’s see…  146 Pax in the headline? Wrong. 139 pax.  The picture above the article?  It’s a Boeing 737.  The article about the incident itself?  It’s about a McDonnell Douglas MD80.  Inside the article, there’s references to both 139 pax and 7 crew (which I know is wrong), and then a little farther down it’s changed to 139 pax and 5 crew (which is correct).  People on the ground reporting a problem with a plane when said plane is at 4,000 feet?  I hardly think so.  Not unless an engine freaking fell off or something like that!  And there’s the ever present “Some say…” towards the bottom of the article, where the “reporter” mentions American’s “significant problems with engines, according to Fox News” – and then cites absolutely nothing to back up that claim.

Such crap…  Hell, I could do a better job!  And like I said, I’m a freaking amateur hack!

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Where My 2 Worlds Intersect

I’m not only proudly American, and proudly Union, I’m also an airline guy.  So this bit of information from Jim Hightower intersects both of my worlds.

Hightower put together an article on his website called “Fixing American Airlines”.  And I tend to agree with the man, on many, many things.  He’s spot on here, as usual.

Anyone who’s paid attention to airline news has heard about American Airlines 757s losing rows of seats – they’ve literally come loose during flights.  Scary as hell, right?  I was just on an American 757 a few weeks ago, though we didn’t notice anything different…  Anyway, American is going through their bankruptcy, and their CEO has said that not all maintenance needs to be done here – by US workers.  It can be outsourced – you know, cheaper for the airlines.

So then the seats started coming loose.  And…  Well, let’s just see how Jim put it:

In September, when the seats started coming loose, the brass callously drove company morale further down by implying that American’s maintenance crews, who are members of the Transport Workers Union, were the culprits. But TWU fired right back, pointing out that maintenance of two lines of 757s, including seats, had been outsourced to a non-union, low-wage corporation where employees don’t get expert union training or regular on-site reviews by federal safety inspectors.

HA!  Those in power want so much to slash costs – and send jobs overseas – that they will use anything to say American workers aren’t up to snuff.  But in this case, those greedy executives at American Airlines were hoisted by their own petard.

Sounds like the greedy short-sighted outsourcers at American Airlines need to be outsourced, and those that truly care about the company need to take over.  ”Why?” you may ask.  Because this is something people remember – for a long time.  Don’t believe me?  The Ford Edsel came out 52 years ago, but Ford still can’t shake the link between “Fords” and the “Edsel” being a lemon – and comparisons of “X is the new Ford Edsel” still continue to this day.

American had better come clean, or they won’t make it 50 years to even be made fun of!

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Dear Idiot, Welcome to Jail

I can’t believe this kind of thing still happens these days!

So some brilliant man decides to joke about having a bomb in his bag when he goes to check into his flight at Anchorage International late Saturday night.  Well, really his friend’s bag – but still.  And he said he was “joking” and “flirting”.

Seriously, you simpleton?  That’s just…  Well, for lack of a better word, stupid.

What’s better, this guy’s an umpire – so you know he’s used to making quick decisions.  And this one was a bad one.  Seriously.  What’s worse?  This guy isn’t allowed to leave Alaska, because he’s a flight risk.

Okay, so that’s a little overboard.  But still.

Totally reminds me of yelling at the private security firm that’s at the MCI (Kansas City) airport as I was passing through security a few years back when two of the officers, who were working the baggage x-ray machine, were “joking” about planes crashing and exploding.  Seriously.  Except they got to keep their jobs, whereas this dillhole in Alaska’s stuck until his hearing.

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NO, NO, NO! GOD NO! And have I said NO yet?

So I get these teaser headlines (thank you Google news alerts!) about certain topics that I may miss from elsewhere.  And today’s teaser headline was:

Boeing Planning To Ramp Up In-Flight Calling, Wi-Fi And Entertainment

OMFG, NO!

Sure, airports are filled with noisy people who are on speakerphone conference calls, loud salesmen, etc.  But usually your time in the air is your “quiet time”, especially on longer flights.  So why in the hell would Boeing want to enable people to bring the noisy airport environment into the airplane?

Last Sunday night, I already had the loudest man of all time bellowing loudly about just about any subject to every single person around him (including the guy next to him who clearly didn’t want to talk based on his actions of turning away, putting earphones in, etc).  Can you imagine that guy on a conference call?  And what about those people who decide to put you on speaker?

You want to create a revolt?  Enable cellphone use in the air, and we’ll not only have a revolt, but we’ll be tossing bodies out of airplanes from 35,000 feet.

The only thing good about the linked story is the picture of the beautiful 747-800.  That, and better Wi-Fi options.  But that’s it!

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Y’all know I’m going to hell, right?

A few minutes ago, I was reading an account of a small private plane crash that the pilot and his only occupant walked away from.  That’s a good thing!  A Congressional candidate from Washington State, Jim Postma, accidentally landed his plane without lowering the landing gear.  He and his wife were the only occupants, and they walked away from the wreckage of the plane.

So why’m I going to hell?  Because the last sentence in the article says,

According to his website, Postma is a graduate of Purdue University and has worked as a simulation engineer and rocket scientist.

BWAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAA!!!  He’s a rocket scientist!  So now we know it takes more than one rocket scientist to land a plane properly.  But one of the commenters in the post stole the show, with this quote:

 It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to put a landing gear down

::snark::  Oh my…  Why am I suddenly sitting in this handbasket, and why’s it getting so hot?

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Dear TSA: WTF?

This is frustrating…  People – including me – have gone off about the TSA and their ‘porno scanners’; what an invasion of privacy they are, how unsafe they are, and the like.  A judge ordered that the TSA was supposed to hold public comments, so that we could hear from people and experts.  You know, like the fact that the backscatter machines can cause up to 100 cases of cancer per year (and that’s when they’re working properly!)

So finally, the TSA has set up – 19 months later than it was ordered to – a public comment period, scheduled for February 2013.  Get ready, folks!  Unless you like having your ‘nads subjected to radiation or photographed every time you go to the airport.

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American’s making a bold, and smart move

I’m really happy to hear about some of the new things going on at American Airlines.  Yes, they’re mired in bankruptcy, and the speculation about a tie-up between American and US Airways is out there (with the city of Philadelphia throwing their weight behind such a deal).  But this new news is about American’s new planes.

American is going after the business traveler market.  Hard.  And this can only be good for them, because I think they’re going to win it.

The elusive business traveler is a client that is most loved by the airlines, but after 2001, the need for these travelers has tapered.  Sure, it’s been coming back, but there’s no single airline that’s really going after that market hard.  Until American’s announcement yesterday.

American is introducing their Airbus A321 Transcontinental fleet with 3 classes of service (click here for a video introduction).  Yep, this is a good thing to start.  But not only the three classes of service is on the plate.  They’ve also committed to WiFi on every plane, as well as a powerport.  That means business travelers – in coach, business, or first – will all have the same ability to continue their work at 36,000 feet.  And for business travelers like me, that’s a huge plus.  Many airlines have WiFi, but not throughout their fleet – and those that do rarely have powerports.  I remember a Continental flight 2 years ago where I had power, but absolutely no WiFi, which I think is a crime…

But American is doing it right.  New, fuel efficient planes with 3 classes of service (including lie-flat seats), powerports with USB at every seat in the plane, and WiFi.  Given the choice, I would definitely take an American flight (even paying $50 one-way more than a competitor’s flight without WiFi and/or power) for these amenities.

So good on you, American Airlines.  And business travelers?  Welcome to your ‘Office In The Clouds’.

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Freedom Of Expression v. The TSA

And who wins?  Freedom of Expression!

Remember a few months back when there was a guy who protested the TSA by stripping naked in the middle of Portland International Airport?  Well he went to trial on indecency charges, and they were dropped by the judge.

I can’t believe they even bothered to take the guy to trial, but they did.  But there’s a ruling in Oregon that freedom of speech/freedom of expression can include being naked, and that’s why the judge threw the charges out.

One for the good guys!

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My First US Airways Flight

Well, I’ve abandoned my usual Alaska Air to fly on US Airways for a few weeks, just for a little exposure. Thing is, I’m not all that impressed…

I did choose to pay for my Gold status (a trial for $400) on US Airways, which has given me a first class upgrade on my first flight. But so far, that’s my only perk.

Yes, I’m leaving on a Monday morning, at the buttcrack of dawn, but it’s a Monday. I’d planned on doing a couple of hours of work to make up for not being on site first thing Monday morning, but that’s out of the question since there’s no WiFi on the plane. Oh well… Maybe I’ll have breakfast.

Oh wait. There’s no meal, nor is there food for sale. Seriously.

But there is a blanket and pillow – if you want e. coli or the bird flu.

Missed amenities, and unwelcome ones. This is gonna be a long few weeks.

::sigh::

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